Here’s the problem with gay marriage: there is no such thing. It doesn’t exist.
How could I say such a thing? I am by no means attempting to be inflammatory or sensational. Simply truthful: marriage is not a man-made institution; thus man has no right to define, redefine, or transform what God has ordained and established sovereignly. Marriage is from God, belongs to God, and is a prophetic declaration that He wants to make to the human race about His relationship with us. Therefore, we need to tread carefully and fearfully around this subject. It is precious to Him.
The secondary issue related to a gay man’s “right” to marry is the cry, “How can true love be denied?” Again, both the issue of “rights” and “true love” are beside the point. Outside of intimate relationship with Him, the Father has given men the freedom of choice and the freedom to walk in a manner contrary to His will. However, calling that free expression of the heart “love” does not mean that God now approves, sanctions, or desires to fill the earth with homosexual relationships. His opinions do not evolve, and His boundaries for men and women are clear.
Therein, however, lies the heart of the matter. If this was truly only a fight for “civil rights” within a free society, then the issues at hand could be contained within a political, or legal, debate. If rights within a free society are being denied to men, then citizens must work together to see that all men and women are treated equitably, charitably, and honorably. However, it is not really about what is ethically, politically, or legally permissible. This debate is about – and has always been about – what is morally and spiritually permissible.
What lies at the core of the debate is not the right of men to live with other men and enjoy civil and political rights and privileges; it is about men being able to engage together in intimacy and have that union considered as holy and sacred as the union between a man and a woman in “holy matrimony.” In other words, the ultimate desire in redefining marriage is the redefinition of morality itself, what is sin and what is not, and what is shameful – and what is not.
That is the ultimate problem with the “gay marriage debate”. We conduct the discussion from within a man-centered arena as we look to present the most compassionate arguments for our “side”. Beloved, God is NOT on “our side” of the debate. The plumb line and ultimate test – in the fear of the Lord – is whether or not we are on His side.
“What do you think, Father?” This must be the primary question on our hearts and minds – we must work to align ourselves with His heart rather than bolstering our wise-sounding opinions. We must not succumb to wisdom that is not from above – wisdom that is “earthly, sensual,” and, ultimately….”demonic” in nature. This kind of wisdom breeds confusion and “every evil thing”. This kind of wisdom destroys the very lives compassionate, well-meaning folks are trying to save, and help.
I know this – the church cannot be passive on this issue. We can be loving, we can express love, and we can treat men and women struggling with immorality (homosexual AND heterosexual) with compassion, tenderness, and kindness. What we cannot do is redraw God’s boundaries in the name of compassion. That is not compassion. That is compromise. It is not loving. It is fearful.
This is not the hour to be fearful, but to be loving as God is loving and declare the wisdom of the boundaries He has drawn – in relationships, in marriage, and in love. To do this is the only true way to serve, love, and honor those who are hurting, broken, and trapped in the shame of immorality. To be faithful to declare the truth of God’s word, God’s heart, and God’s plan is to participate in His means to true freedom and joy for all who turn to Him.